Is it a blessing or a curse to have a long-lived old man in your family?A 69-year-old woman spoke from her heart
Guide language a lot of people think that the person still has father mother to old age is a special happy thing, because as long as the parents are still in, that oneself is still a child forever, someone cares about love forever.However, many people think that the elderly are the suffering of their children.So is it a blessing or a curse for children to have a long-lived parent?Let’s take a look at the story of huo, a 69-year-old woman.I am 69 years old and have been retired for 19 years.People’s retired life is full of fun, live extremely comfortable.I was not so lucky. Two years after my retirement, my son and daughter-in-law gave birth to a child and asked me to take care of him.I have only one son. Of course, I love him dearly and hope he can live a good life. Therefore, if my son asks for anything, I will certainly help him.In addition, my wife did not retire at that time, and I had nothing to do at home every day, so IT was better to help my son take care of the child.My life in my son’s house is very hard, after all, taking care of children is quite tiring, and I usually have to help with the housework, so I am very busy every day.But I enjoy it, after all, I help is not an outsider, even if again hard, I also feel that life is sweet.Later, when my grandson went to elementary school, he didn’t need me much, so I went back to my own home and began to enjoy my old age.The first two years were pretty boring, because I didn’t have many friends and I stayed at home most of the time. The house was a bit more lively when my wife came home from work.But later after my wife retired, my life is much more fulfilling than before, my wife often take me out shopping, we have been to the city’s streets and lanes, and basically every gourmet restaurant we have patronized.No worries every day, a wake up thinking of eating and drinking and skittering, feel this old age life is really too happy.But when I was 61, my mother was paralyzed by a stroke, completely unable to take care of herself.I felt like the sky was falling because I had to take care of my mother, who had three children.My eldest brother passed away 16 years ago, and my younger sister was married far away, more than 1,000 kilometers away from home, so she couldn’t share with me, so NATURALLY I had to take care of my mother.The only lucky thing is that my husband is a very good son-in-law. He has always been very filial to my mother. So when he heard that my mother was paralyzed, he offered to take my mother into our home.Finally, the two of us went to pick up my mother. After my mother came to our house, we could no longer go anywhere as cool as before. After all, my mother was surrounded by people 24 hours a day and had to be taken care of.Taking care of my mother’s food and drink is relatively easy, because her requirements are not high, as long as she can eat full, every time we cook food she will eat one by one, never picky.But my mother has been incontinent ever since she was paralyzed, and most of the time she can’t control it. Every time we get to her, she’s already down her pants.So I have to wash 78 pants almost every day, sometimes I can’t stand the smell, wearing a mask has been retching, really is particularly sad.I used to put my mother in diapers, but it didn’t work because she got bedsores, so I didn’t want her to wear diapers anymore.At ordinary times can only put a separate urine mat, so will not stick to the bed, but also more convenient cleaning.I couldn’t get a good night’s sleep because my mother had to get up three times every night to go to the bathroom or drink water.I have to get up with her, so I can’t rest well.Old age, once the rest is not good, the state of mind will be very poor, especially during the day no spirit, but also affect the physical health.Then I couldn’t stand it any longer, so I asked my wife to take turns with me.In fact, many of my friends are very curious. My wife and I both have pensions, and they have tens of thousands of dollars every month. Why can’t we hire a nanny to take care of my mother?It wasn’t that we didn’t want to, it was just that my mother didn’t like to be waited on by strangers.We had a nanny before, but the first day she came, she was sent away by my mother, saying if we hired another nanny, she would die.So my wife and I had to give up the idea of a nanny, and we had to take care of her life.Although taking care of my mother is not easy, I can get along with my wife who shares the burden with me.But two years ago, my mother suffered from senile dementia, and my life became even more sad since then, because my mother was always uncertain and her temper became particularly strange.Each time the onset of the time are unwilling to stay at home, clamoring to go out.So I had to push her out in a wheelchair and walk with her for so long that I blistered my feet a few times.Sometimes I can’t push her in a wheelchair, and she makes me carry her, which is really hard for me.Because my mother has more than 100 pounds, heavier than ME, and my body is not as good as before, the strength is also much smaller, there is no way to carry the mother.But if I don’t, my mother will always be angry. I’m really difficult.Now mother was not so easy-going as before. She ate whatever she wanted. She ordered everything every day.And for our hard work to cook the food, she is always dissatisfied, always dislike us to do not delicious.Sometimes did not eat the couple directly knocked over the food, our family do not know how many broken bowls, then I really can not do, can only give her stainless steel basin, so it does not matter.The most irritating is that mother often does not sleep at night, often crying in the big night, really special disturbing.The property owners have come to our home for several times, and the neighbors often come to complain, but I really have no way, mother does not listen to me, how happy they are.I used to take my mother to live in a nursing home, but we came back after only a few days. Because my mother hated the life there and shouted to go home every day, she cried every day in the nursing home and cried her eyes out, so I had to take her home.Now my mother is 95 years old, and I have been taking care of her for 8 years. These years, MY life is really exhausted. Now I feel very tired every day, and I always wish to end this day as soon as possible.But now my mother’s health is still good, a few more years will not be a problem, so I can only dry my tears to carry on.Everyone says that an old man is a treasure in a family, but in my opinion, a long life is not a blessing, but a curse.My old age was miserable because of my old mother.But I have no way, after all, this is my mother who gave birth to me and raised me, without her, I will not come, so no matter how hard I have to stick to it and give my mother retirement.It is really important to have a good health in our last years. Only when we are healthy can we take good care of our own life and do not need to trouble our children.A long life is a blessing only when you are in good health. If you are not in good health, you will not only live a miserable life, but also drag down the lives of your children and make their old age miserable.